A Life of Adventure

What to know when seeking a Colombian Bride

Colombia is a poor country and has a rising reputation for relationship fraud. Of course there are plenty of good, beautiful and honest women seeking marriage with foreigners. There is also an active population of scammers, fraud schemes and old fashioned gold diggers. Some women seek financial gain and lifestyle upgrades, an escape from poverty. Others are actually seeking a loving relationship, marriage and something new and exciting. How to tell this difference is the big question.

If she asks for money, put the brakes on. Beware of family or medical “emergencies” where the woman needs cash and financial support fast. Know that sending money via Western Union is likely lost in the event that she’s a scammer. Understand that the scammers are professional criminals and are very difficult to distinguish between an honest and trustworthy woman.

Educated yourself by reading about scam and fraud methods. Knowing about the different scams will help you recognize any foul play. The schemes and fraud efforts vary in strategy, but all have one thing in common, money. Money is usually requested in the form of advance fee fraud, where the criminal needs help with school, medical, rent, family, visa, etc. You can read more about the fraud types at Wikipedia’s site for relationship fraud and advance fee fraud. This is a major step in prevention.

Once you understand the fraud types and warnings signs, consider a trip to Colombia. Get to know her and her country. See for yourself who you’re dealing with. This is a key step in not only preventing fraud, but also important in establishing a meaningful relationship. Take time to get to know her. A Colombian woman in a hurry to marry is a major red flag and warning sign.

Lastly, if all checks out, get a professional background check by a firm with a local presence in Bogota and Barranquilla. Wymoo offers confidential investigations and has years of experience dealing with potential brides and relationships in Colombia.

Best of luck, and do your homework!

A. Hathaway

Copyright © 2005-2007 A. Hathaway

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I have now lived in China for the better part of 5 years, and I’m constantly astounded by the broad misconceptions held by Westerners about China and Chinese Women. Here a few of the major ones:

1. All Chinese Are The Same.

We all know that Germans are not the same as Italians, French are not the same as the British, and Swedish are not the same as Spanish. In America, no one thinks that Californians are the same as New Yorkers, or Texans the same as Minnesotans, but for some reason Westerners all assume that all 1.3 billion Chinese think, act and are the same.

In truth there are 56 different specific cultures within China. The Han do make up more than 90% of the total population, but even within the Han culture there are endless varieties of ways of thinking and acting. Every Province, indeed every major city, has a distinct linguistic dialect and numerous cultural variations from all the others.

If you enter a relationship with a Chinese woman from Urumqi, Xinjiang, then you’d better be asking yourself “What does a woman from Urumqi think?”, not “What does a Chinese woman think?”, or you may be sadly unprepared to understand your new mate.

2. All Chinese Women Are The Same

Most cultures and most places in China are male dominated. In many locations it’s not unusual at all to see the little Chinese girl (at least after the courting stage) trailing her husband by several feet, hauling suitcases and boxes that weigh more than her, while he strolls blithely along without a care in the world, ignoring her entirely. But this is not universal, and the exceptions can be surprising.

Shanghainese women generally seem to dominate, and Chinese men from other places love to deride Shanghai men for being whipped by their women. In fact, Shanghai men are probably the closest thing in China to us Westerners. There is a cultural minority in Yunnan Province in Western China, the Muo Suo, which is totally female dominated. The male can be kicked out of the home at anytime, and frequently is, with no rights whatsoever. The female can have as many males as she chooses, and can discard them at will.

And while China is generally still male dominated, that should not lead to the conclusion that Chinese women are all docile and subservient; far from it. If the male fulfils his role properly, and lives up to his obligations, he is the boss, but screw up and he can quickly find himself answering some hard and pointed questions from the “little woman”.

3. All Chinese Women Want a Western Man

Nonsense! Many Chinese women are interested in Western men, and for many reasons. One is that we have been well trained by Western women to treat women well, and generally, we are more inclined to behave like Shanghainese men. If you were a woman, wouldn’t you prefer that we carry the suitcases and heavy loads while you strolled casually ahead in a state of bliss, or even if we carry our share in fairness and equality? Another reason is that on average we are perceived to have more money and a greater ability to provide financial security, and financial security is important to Chinese women (just as it is to Western women).

However, I would guess that there are far more Chinese women who are not interested in Western men than are. But, even if only 20% are interested, that is roughly 125 million women, which is plenty to go around for Western men who are interested in them. And while not all Chinese women are “great partner material”, for reasons to be revealed in a future article (for now you’ll just have to trust me), I still like your chances of finding that great partner here in China among Chinese women far better than among Western women. But try to avoid glaring misconceptions while you’re on your quest.

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If you’re currently a member a web dating site about Asian women or Chinese women then you’re probably there because you’re looking for a change from the type of personal relationships that now seem to exist between Western Men and Western Women. You’re tired of women who grew up in the “ME” generation, always looking strictly for “What’s in this relationship for me?” Nowadays, when you meet a new Western Woman who you find attractive, before the conversation has even really begun, she’s already drilling you about your occupation and your assets. How much money do you make and how much “stuff” do you have.

You’ve heard that Chinese Women are different than that, so you’re online to check it out.

Well first, let’s be honest. A Chinese Woman will also want to know that you have an income and that you are financially stable. Like women everywhere, she also wants a secure future. The difference is, most Chinese Women come from a world where a normal job is a great job, a simple home is a great home, and family is everything. Will there be food on the table: good enough. Will we have a home that I can clean and cook in and make comfortable for you: good enough. You’re a truck driver (mechanic, teacher, male nurse, etc): that’s fantastic. Just be reliable.

If you want a simple life where you do your job, which is the primary income earner, and she does her job, which is manage the home and family, then Chinese women make great life partners. That’s not to say that she won’t help you with business if that’s what you want, but you’ll be the boss. And it doesn’t mean she’s not prepared to have a job too. She will likely prove to be a very hard worker. It does mean that running the home is her job as well. You will have a say in all the important decisions, but when it comes to day to day operations sit back and let her take over, it’s what she does best.

But here is the most important thing, a Chinese Woman marries for life. Once she commits, she will invest every ounce of her being into your future, your home, your family and your life together. If that is the kind of wife you want, then you’re in the right place.

Her priorities in approximate order are husband and children, parents (hers and yours), home, face (what does the world think of your family), herself, her importance to you, her job, her friends.

Chinese women want to love you and they want to be loved by you. Unlike Western Women, they will not be out to instantly change you the moment they have their grip on you. So long as you meet two requirements they will be happy. First, you must love them. Second, you must not be frivolous with money; that is you won’t spend your last dime on whiskey when the kids are hungry. Well frankly, if you are that frivolous with money then you really need a Chinese Woman more than she needs you.

Chinese women like to spend as much time with you as possible. The more you can be together the happier they are. They’re happy to go out with you and play, spend time at the movies, relax in a pub with your friends, walk on a beach, anything so long as she is with you. Equally a quiet night at home is perfect. To her, time with her husband is important. But that doesn’t mean you have to be with her every moment, it just means that every moment of your time you do give he will be appreciated.

Unlike Western Women, a Chinese Woman will not sit around with her buddies secretly badmouthing you. To her, if you look bad she looks bad, and she would lose face. So long as you are covering the bare basics, she will outwardly praise you to the roof, because if her friends think you look good, then she gains face. And if she says you’re not a good husband, then implicitly she is failing as a wife.

China’s economy is growing fast, and these days most Chinese are proud of their place in the world and believe in their future. Just the same, the chance to live in the West, to get a passport from your country, to improve her economic status remains a potential motive for marrying a Western Man. But if it is so, it is low on a long list of motives. The number one motivator by far for a Chinese Woman to seek to marry a Western Man is that she is undervalued by Chinese Men. She wants someone who will appreciate her for the many things she does for him, who will treat her with respect, who will love her. She often cannot find that at home.

In addition, while many young Chinese Women are looking for someone who will treat them as an equal, Chinese Women over the age of about 28 are already beginning to find few Chinese Men who are interested in them as life partners. While Western Men appreciate a partner who has life experience and is a real woman, Chinese Men want young girls to fill that role, to the extent that a Chinese Woman over 30 has become almost unmarketable as a wife.

Not to be repetitive, but Chinese women want you to love them and they want to love you, to look after your needs, to fulfill your desires. In their minds, one makes a good life and a good future through a good and loving marriage and a good home. To most Chinese women marriage is the most important single thing in life, because it is the center point of their existence from the moment they enter into marriage until the moment of their death. It is not to be taken lightly.

Chinese women like to please their men, and to receive acknowledgment that they have pleased him. Every Chinese woman loves it when her man gives her a little gift, because it means she has pleased him and he appreciates it.

None of this is to say that they never will be angry, never will express their concerns. And when a Chinese Woman reaches the boiling point, sit back and stay silent. Let her get it out, let her have her say, and acknowledge her righteousness, or watch out. And if you abuse her, physically or emotionally, then all we’ve said will go out the window. An abusive husband has no right to expect her respect and love. But given proper respect, she will return it many times over. She will honor your love, your marriage and your family, always placing your needs and those of your children above her own.

Generally Chinese woman are beautiful, inside and outside. 1 in 10 Chinese Women are obese. They are very feminine, sometimes childlike in spirit, petite and delicate. They take great care of their physical appearance. They almost always look 10 years younger than they are. Very few smoke or drink. They like to try new things, explore, and they love to laugh and have fun.

To most Chinese Women age difference is not a major factor in choosing their life partner. They are often attracted to older men, and 10 to 20 years difference is not a big problem to most, but you need to consider if it is important to you. A Chinese Women with little life experience can be just as trying as a Western Woman to a Western Man who has reached an age of little patience.

Chinese women like sex, but with many (not everyone, but many) their knowledge is a little limited. While they view it as an act of nature, they have not usually been with a partner who treats it as more than a quick event to satisfy himself, with his partner’s needs of no importance. So you may find yourself needing to do some teaching and coaching, but her response will almost always be one of delight and openness. With patience and guidance she will become an excellent partner, because, again, you are her husband and she wants to please you.

If a Chinese Woman appeals to you you’re not alone. And obviously web dating is a great way to find, meet and get to know Chinese women.

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ChinaLoveMatch.net, an International Chinese dating service is here to help you to do just that; find your perfect match online no matter if you are in a quest for dating, romance, love, a long term relationship, marriage, or your life mate and/or soul mate.

Banking on the perception of and need for a stress-free and time-saving socialization alternative for millions of online daters, ChinaLoveMatch.net has fast become the plausible and trustworthy path to the growing International and Chinese singles social pool, the route of connection between Western men of distinction and beautiful Chinese women.

On CLM you will be exposed to Chinese personals that let you choose your dream mate, a beautiful Chinese women., and turn your love life into an instant success. Never ending and healthy relationships take time, effort, energy, patience and care, which is why ChinaLoveMatch.net offers you ongoing advice and tips for developing and maintaining healthy relationships and various steps that, if followed, promise you an unsinkable love life.

Online dating should be fun and amusing, not a difficult and onerous task. That is why ChinaLoveMatch.net should be your first and only choice for meeting and dating Chinese women and Chinese singles. CLM offers you our fun, safe and reliable Chinese dating service not solely to erase the scars of that disastrous relationship experience that ended so badly at the hands of Ms Wrong but rather to replace those bad memories with a happy and solidly grounded ongoing relationship with Ms Right, that giving, caring and sensuous Chinese lady who improves your life on a daily basis and your quality of living forever.

With Millions of Online daters being accosted daily by fake members, scammers and worse, and even by unscrupulous so called free dating sites who cater to the fakes and scammers as they keep the traffic flowing, the search is on for dating sites that can be trusted to always keep their members best interest at heart. With ChinaLoveMatch.net, the search is over. We receive thank you letters everyday from happy members who are grateful for our quality service and our diligence in keeping our website safe and enjoyable. At CLM we spend hours every day rejecting, investigating and deleting any applicants or members found to harbor dishonest or dishonorable intentions, leaving you, our International male member, free to spend your time enjoyably meeting and getting to know our many thousands of beautiful and genuine Chinese female members.

Our powerful search options, advanced profiles, quality photo displays, instant messaging and video/audio chat, combined with our ground breaking instant translation, produce an environment conducive to finding Ms. Right in the most fun and enjoyable fashion available, all at fees costing less for a year than the cost of your last disastrous dinner date and less for a month than the bottle of wine you drank to forget it. It’s a small investment indeed to meet and capture the heart of your perfect match, your special Chinese lifemate.

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Looking for a Chinese wife or Asian bride from China? Chinese women are naturally beautiful, faithful, modest, supportive and family oriented. If you find the right one, she will make your heart sing. It is like a marriage made in heaven!

Why China you might asked? China is one of the few countries left whereby most of the Chinese women still retained the traditional Chinese values. In addition, we believed China also have the most beautiful women in terms of quality and quantity in the whole Asean region. However, please note these kind of women in China is disappearing fast as the country is becoming more and more westernised, so if you are a sincere, kind and responsible gentleman looking for a Chinese wife, we suggest you better act fast.

At www.mychinalove.net all the ladies are intensively pre-screened on a one to one basis by marriage agencies in China. Every one of them are sincerely looking for a real and serious relationship, maybe leading to marriage. If this sounds good to you, sign up now! It’s FREE and NO MEMBERSHIP FEES! You got everything to gain and nothing to lose!

As a member, it is free to browse the woman profiles, photos and send Show Interest Notes so that you know in advance, how they look like and whether they are interested in you. If you want to get connected to a particular lady, it will only cost you a little to send and receive messages using the Quick Mail System. Here’s the good news - www.mychinalove.net do not charge membership fees! You “Pay As You Go” – you only pay for the messages you sent and received from your ladies and you will find our charges are very reasonable. Most important, don’t you think it is a small price to pay to make love happen to you. I believe this is one of the best investments you ever make to find your special someone. Life is so much more fun when you are in love!

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